Mercury Retrograde in Leo: July 26th – August 19th, 2018, “We” Are Not Amused

Mercury Retrograde in Leo
7/26 – 8/19/18
“We” Are Not Amused
Brad Kronen

Queen Victoria

The Sovereign of the British Empire who was both a frequent employer of the  “Royal We” as well as a royal member of that beleaguered group of mortal subjects better known as the “Mercury ruled” ,
Her Royal Highness Victoria, Queen of England



Did you know that the royal monarch who ruled over the largest Empire in History had an extremely unusual way of referencing herself in the presence of others?
Her Royal Highness, Ruler of the British Empire where “the Sun never set” who until only recently had the longest reign of any given monarch of 63 years from 1837 – 1901, Queen Victoria, Sovereign of the British Isles and Empress of India never used the word “I” or “my”.

Instead, whenever the Queen referenced her noble self, she used what is called the “Royal We” or in more formal terms, the “Majestic Plural“.

In other high falutin’ words, Queen Victoria replaced the words “I” and “my” with “we” and “our”.  The premise being with her position as Empress of an Empire so vastly spread across the globe that at any given time of day or night, some part of Victoria’s Domain stood beneath sunlight, meant using the singular to reference her immensely important self simply did not suffice.

Victoria used the Royal “We” to refer to her and her Empire as if one synchronous entity.

By far, one of Queen Victoria’s most memorable uses of the “Royal We” happened after a dinner that had just concluded between her royal self and her royal staff at Windsor Castle one evening.  A newly hired young man referred to as a “saucy equerry” which I’ll interpret as a stable boy with a potty mouth begged the permission of Her Royal Highness and all present if he could tell an after dinner story.

Victoria nodded towards the general direction of the kid with the mouth of a sailor which meant the commoner was given the green light to do his thing.

No details are recorded but supposedly Sammy the Stable Boy then proceeds to tell a tale that was “spicy with impropriety” involving of all things…..horses.  When he was done, instead of any kind of polite applause, the young lad’s tale of equine intrigue garnered nothing but the sound of crickets followed by the Empress of the British Empire flatly stating to all within earshot,  “We are not amused.

Well, my Lord and Lady readers, that time of year has come around once again which your author tends to find most royally unamusing – Mercury Retrograde.

Three times (sometimes four) per year for three and a half weeks per cycle the fastest heavenly body in our Solar System with the shortest orbital around the Sun otherwise known as the planet Mercury goes into backwards or “Retrograde” motion.

Named after the ancient Roman messenger god, the planet Mercury astrologically oversees the flow of communication amongst we mortals and rules over not just human communication but every aspect which revolves around it, such as its tools or devices, in particular cell phones, texts, computers, and email.  Mercury is also considered the planet of “motion” and rules over the devices we employ to move out and about in the world, namely planes, trains, and automobiles.

In short, during a Mercury Retrograde cycle communications of all kinds get royally screwed up.

Times and dates for appointments get switched around.

Emails are sent but not received.

Directions given are incorrect (this includes Siri & GPS).

Phone calls may go through on the caller’s end, but not the receiver’s.

Voice mail may be left by the caller but not recorded by the device.

You name it, if it has to be communicated to another person during a Mercury Retrograde the status quo is for the next 3 1/2 weeks the thing you need to impart will get somehow screwed up on its path of communication along the way.  With all that in mind it’s best to double, nope scratch that, TRIPLE check pertinent information that needs to be communicated to others and vice versa.

Mercury Retrograde

At this point, some of you are thinking “What does any of this have to do with freaking Queen Victoria?

Good question.

The current Retrograde cycle of Mercury will be taking place within the “royalty” sign represented by the “King” of the Jungle of Leo the Lion. Want your communications with others to not only get screwed up but to boomerang back and explode in your face like a grenade?  Say anything akin to the following:

– I’m just going to come right out and say it...

– What I’m about to tell you is for your own good…..OR
What I’m about to tell you is because you need to be made aware of this about yourself…

You there, come here.

– I’m gonna give him/her a piece of my mind…..

– And you are?


– Excuse me! I don’t believe I was finished talking!

To communicate this concept as clearly as possible, another way to impart these words of warning is: with the current Mercury Retrograde occurring in the royalty sign of Leo, it is not recommended to speak like Queen Victoria.  In other words  avoid speaking down to anyone or attempt putting anyone in their place.  Not only will it be grossly misinterpreted, you risk having the royal crap beat out of you as well.

And for those of you who still use the “Royal We” just between you and me, do that only in the privacy of your own rubber room, I mean home!

Signing Contracts & Buying New Are Royal No-No’s

No matter the sign Mercury Retrograde takes place in, two other rules to abide by:

Mercury Retrograde Rule #1 – Do not sign any legal or official documentation during a Mercury Retrograde!  It’s like signing your entire person away to whomever else is involved in the document.  And since it is something official or legal, it can wait 3 weeks until everything is in the clear.

Mercury Retrograde Rule # 2 – It’s best to avoid buying anything brand new during a Mercury Retrograde but most especially ELECTRONICS or ANYTHING MECHANICAL.  Think I’m kidding?   Then by all means have fun dealing with the lemon computer or car that you just had to impulsively purchase because you simply had to have it RIGHT NOW!

Given the time honored qualities associated with Rules 1 and 2, believe me, another 3 weeks of postponement will not matter all that much and will save you a King’s ransom’s worth of headaches.

All of the above applies to everyone but most ESPECIALLY to those who are Mercury ruled, namely Geminis, Virgos, Gemini Rising, and Virgo Rising folk.

And just so Vicki doesn’t feel singled out, in some ways the Empress of England was very much like you and me, especially when it came to dealing with the nuisance of a Mercury Retrograde, given the fact Her Royal Highness was one of the Mercury ruled, a Gemini just like your Mercury beleaguered author.

Carry on, good readers, and Godspeed through this most communicatively unamusing of times.


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